67. Who am I within this relationship. Part 3.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base this relationship around feelings of love.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize how that within this point of wanting to exist within the polarity of Love I am actually creating the recipe and manifestation of the downfall of this relationship.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to let memories of love experiences within my past relationships carry over into this one in which I am looking to reenact the previous experience. And actually not realizing that this is myself looking to sabotage myself in creating energy within my own mind in which I am accepting the reality of not feeling worthy within myself to be in a functional, practical, and genuinely open relationship with another being in which it is not bogged down by feelings.

I commit myself to be forward and open within how I approach this relationship in which I place myself in a point of self honesty about what is really going on within myself and not hiding within embarrassment or within a point of suppressing something within myself or something that I going on within me. Allowing this to be brought into the open arena always and immediately so there is no built up tension or things lurking just beneath the surface.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not place trust within a practical starting point in which I am moving to allow the way that I feel about the other being to infiltrate my decisions within my approach with the other being.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see the point of solution which is to stop myself within the moment of reaction in which I am looking to participate in thoughts feelings and emotions about the relationship in which I am allowing myself the feeling of falling in love, or the emotion of worry about screwing up the relationship/agreement. I commit myself to stop projecting myself into a future event based within a momentary system of worry and doubt, and ignoring the practical tangible moment by allowing myself to fall into feelings.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to become the point of breathe within those moments and bring myself back to the moment out of my mind.

I commit myself to breathe in those moments when and as I see myself moving into my mind, and realize that those points of love and fear is my mind jumping back and forth within myself only looking to survive within this system of relationships within my mind.

When and as I see myself not trusting myself with my ability to direct myself in the moment in what I am choosing to express and or what I am choosing to do within the physical reality around me and actually just giving into mind systems that are carrying over from my past experiences and relationships with other people I stop and breathe.

I commit myself that when in those breathes I remember that I am not only breathing but within that breathe returning to a point of clarity in which the mind does not and cannot exist or move and to trust that absence of mind as a point of genuine reality within my ability to perceive.

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