80. Why The risk pt 2.

When and as I see myself acting out a system of competition that has been within my mind since I was young I stop and breathe. Realizing that these systems were something that was taught to me from within my community and interactions with other children and was something that at the time I had no way of understanding the implications. Yet now as an adult I can actually uncover and investigate the reasons why I still hold these systems within me and apply myself to a solution of self forgiveness and teach myself self trust and self acceptance in what is best for all.

When and as I see myself allowing skateboarding and other areas of actions to become a point of obsession within the context of fulfilling a emotional requirement for myself as a self definition I stop and breathe.

When and as I see myself using skating boarding as a time filler I stop and breathe and see that how at this point I still have a long way to go when it comes to walking myself out of my mind and back into alignment with life, and that my time could be spent in vastly more constructive ways especially as I am learning more about myself everyday and how I can contribute to a world that is best for all.

When and as I see myself within a urge and belief that I need to be out on a skateboard to really be experiencing life I stop myself and breathe and remember that skateboarding really does not have anything to do with being within and as life but is only stimulating a set of feelings that are brought on through chemical reactions within my mind much like the effects of a drug and forming the same types of pathways of addiction.

When and as I see myself allowing myself to move into those feelings of addiction and beliefs that I need to excel at skateboarding to be a fulfilled and successful person in my own eyes I stop myself and breathe and see how this is only a mind system and that bringing myself back here to the present moment in breathe letting myself come into now is extremely supportive in rechecking my starting point to many of these addictions that I am facing.

When and as I see skateboarding take center stage in my life and block out all other points of consideration I stop myself and breathe realizing that there is a entire spectrum of things that I can do that are self supportive expressive and stand within and as life as what is best for all and in those areas is really where the majority of my time and focus could be placed.

Self commitments to continue tomorrow.


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