140. Self corrective statements for 139.

So when and as I see myself losing myself within my day in such a way were I am not regulating my time in a productive and self honest way I stop myself and breathe, and coming to a understanding that the world will not wait for me to “feel” like addressing me within this process.

I commit myself to push myself to be self honest within my time given to entertainment where I do not waste this time and life given to me within things that hold no value.

When and as I see myself making up justifications for me to play games like making a difference “in-game” I stop myself and breathe and realize in that moment that this is my mind attempting to win me over into entertaining myself so I do not actually have to face myself here.

I commit myself to realize that if I were actually able to make a difference here in real life that that expression would naturally carry over into anything that I do, wherein playing a game would not be a point of escape.

I commit myself to see how I will go to long lengths to justify becoming preoccupied within games and television.

I commit myself to stop automatically allowing and accepting these patterns of preoccupation to exist within me with no introspection what so ever.

When and as I see myself living within a patterned life where games and media take the place of and represent relaxation within my experience, I stop and breathe and understand that if I am experiencing myself as needing to relax then obviously something within me must be wound tight.

I commit myself to understand that the physical body may require some rest after exertion but not to confuse this with a point of relaxation which in self honesty I can recognize that much of my relaxation is just dressed up laziness and unwillingness to apply myself.

I commit myself to stop the patterns of feelings where I need to be relaxed all the time.

I commit myself to see how this need to feel relaxed or unstressed is actually a unwillingness to experience anything that I believe is unpleasant.

When and as I see myself being caught up within a game or a tv show thinking that what I doing is wrong and wasting time, feeling guilty about what I am doing, I stop myself and breathe realizing that I am able to practice self awareness and self control in any moment by bringing myself back here in breathe.

I commit myself to live here in breathe even when I am partaking in playing a game or watching tv, where I am making a conscious choice to participate in a certain activity.

I commit myself to remove the charge that I have attached to these points of these activities being bad and waste of time and not stopping to consider the point of finding out who I am within these systems of games and television.

When and as I see myself getting pulled deeper into the games so easily where I do not want to stop or put a limit on the time that I am allotting to these this I stop and breathe and remind myself that while there is nothing wrong with playing a game or watching a show but if it keeps me from actually learning about me and applying myself within the process then there is a problem.

I commit myself to stick to self honest limits within how I approach me time within games, movies, and shows and realize that there is only so much time in a day and that I should be able to set some realistic guidelines and limits for how I conduct myself within a daily basis.

I commit myself to see how these patterns can keep me from really learning about and getting to know me on a more intimate basis.

When and as I see myself beating down on myself within these systems for not being able to seemingly do well withing this process I stop myself and breathe realizing that there is no sense in throwing myself in a pit for wanting to watch some tv, or play a game. Instead I commit myself to start doing so with awareness of what I am doing, am I here within this relationship the the now-ness of breathe in all that I am doing.

I commit myself to stop worrying about the effects that all of the tv screens may have on my body and not seeing how this fear is really based within a point of guilt about spending to much time in front of screens and electronics.

I commit myself to take responsibility within my own experience and to not accept or allow television or games to any more control me within my day to day life.

Ok I will stop here a this time. More to com

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