262. The small things. Sf+Sc.

SO, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up the real directive ability that I have within myself to the habits and distractions that I choose to place in and as the central focus of my day and the way that I experience myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to chase energetic experience within the the simple points of maintaining my living space.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use those simple points as well as other points of distraction like watching TV, playing games, and watching documentaries to be at the forefront of what I choose to do first within my daily life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing those points to be of greater interest to me, rather than walking through the commitments that I have made with myself in walking process.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the struggle that I create within my day by placing the things that can wait or postponed with no ill effect on my ability to walk process in/as a greater value to me because the are about stimulating me energetically. SO, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up the real directive ability that I have within myself to the habits and distractions that I choose to place in and as the central focus of my day and the way that I experience myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to chase energetic experience within the the simple points of maintaining my living space.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use those simple points as well as other points of distraction like watching TV, playing games, and watching documentaries to be at the forefront of what I choose to do first within my daily life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing those points to be of greater interest to me, rather than walking through the commitments that I have made with myself in walking process.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the struggle that I create within my day by placing the things that can wait or postponed with no ill effect on my ability to walk process in/as a greater value to me because the are about stimulating me energetically.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to still give into the experience of getting energetic experiences within the mind, and making that the most important thing to do first.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be aware of what I am doing and within this do not investigate how I am able to become more effective with my time and with my choices in what I do each day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to postpone the things that are required for me to do and thus create a experience of always being behind and never being satisfied.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to never see the point where I am covering up my ability to become more effective since I am judging and taking value within my experience of me based on the energetic feelings that I gain from something.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the guilt that I experience within myself when I do not follow through with my commitments to be the factor for which I do not actually choose to address the point of really walking with integrity throughout my day.

And within that I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to only based my days on the set of conditions within a point of feeling happy or not bored.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to miss out on the ability for me to be the most effective being that I possible can be because I have been choosing to continue looking for the easiest possible way to make it through the day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that within this point that I am actually making things harder for myself by abusing my body with less sleep and subjecting it to things like smoking.

Within these points I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting my process to be about walking this as a point of self honesty where I actually am standing as a real expression of who I am, what my potential is that I can see within myself to be possible and how I would get there.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give into the fear that I will have to deny myself the things that I enjoy to walk this process, where it really only comes down to a point of self honesty where I can actually look at myself in the mirror and
say “yes, you accomplished all you set out to do today.”

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be completely satisfied with the process that I have started to the point where I will continue to seek out things on top of and beside my process that are more important for me to be doing or pursuing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my habitual patterns to interfere with my ability to form a supportive sleeping routine.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to downplay the importance of sleep and believing that I can function the same on 4 hours as I can on 6 or 8, and in fact have not ever really figured out what is a proper amount of sleep that I would need personally.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing this point to become a point of self abuse within my life where I am not allowing myself to form effective behavior by denying myself adequate time for my physical body to rest.

When and as I see myself giving up my directive ability to habits and distractions, and placing these as the most important point within my day, I stop myself and breathe, realizing that in doing so I am in fact creating this experience of giving those habits and distractions the central focus of my world.

I commit myself to stop taking up the belief that my habits have more power over me then I have within my ability to direct me.

I commit myself to realize that being here, standing clear within myself is really the only true point, and if I am having all sorts of experiences within my day about what I should or should not be doing then I realize that this is occurring within the mind.

I commit myself to realize that the point of walking myself through process is really about forming a point of self trust.

When and as I see myself chasing after energetic experiences within my daily responsibilities by postponing my commitments to walk process by placing my daily living duties as a form of escape from walking process of writing.

I commit myself to form self trust within my process by coming to a common sense understanding of what is actually the priorities within the tasks that I choose to do.

I commit myself to see how placing my daily tasks of maintaining my living as a excuse to not walk my process within writing, and within this understand that I need to make time for both aspects of my life where I do not neglect any points of my existence.

I commit myself to see that placing one point above and before another is a point of self denial within how I choose to spend my time and that within that lies a point of self abuse.

I commit myself then to work on both aspects of my living and my process with common sense where I allow myself the time to walk through both points with equal importance and stop using basic daily tasks as the reason why I do not have time for process.

I commit myself to realize that things like watching TV, playing games, watching documentaries are actually things that I can utilize to supplement my life and that placing them first within my life will invariably cause me to neglect myself within walking process.

I commit myself to realize that I place these things as a greater interest to me because I do not actually have to actually face myself directly and I can push back my process of self realization.

When and as I see myself struggling with these points where I look over the fact that many of the things that I am choosing to do actually are not required to be done first and foremost and that within a point of self honesty they are in fact not required to be done when I think that they need to be done and will actually have no ill effects on my experiences of myself in each moment.

And so I commit myself to become self honest about what is really important to be done where I realize what will actually interfere with my ability to walk with myself through process.

I commit myself then to realize what the things that are placed as the priority within my daily living that are only for creating a energetic experience within myself.

I commit myself then to come with a concrete understanding of what will actually support me in being here physically, and support me as my physical human body.

When and as I see myself living within a state of unawareness of what my actual priorities are and could be within a supportive platform of behavior I stop myself and breathe, and within that moment reassess what is really going to be the most effective choice for me to take within that moment.

I commit myself to practice self awareness of what will actually lead me to a decision that is best for myself in the realization of what will lead me to a situation where I will be most effective in creating myself as a example of what is best for all.

I commit myself to realize that the decisions that I come to should be based within a understanding of the things that are required for me to support myself and my partnership physically first.

When and as I see the decisions that I make to be things that are not required at that moment and within that create a experience within myself of always falling behind, I stop myself and breathe, and within that realize that that experience is actually happening within my mind only and from there influencing me energetically to try and make up for the energetic feelings of being behind by creating a more for me experience of positivity to compensate.

I commit myself to realize that this only leads to more procrastination and postponement of the things that I really would need to do to become self supportive.

I commit myself to see how this scenario actually constantly leads me in circles/cycles of which there is no end until I choose to break those circles/cycles and walk a path where I choose to act with integrity of the things that I realize are going to be actually supportive for me.

When and as I see myself only judging my view of myself, and taking value within myself by the energetic experiences that I have, I stop myself and breathe, and understand that this is actually not real as it is only showing me who I am within a starting point of energy and is not actually a point of physically walking myself within self trust and integrity.

When and as I see this to become a point of guilt within myself where I start to judge myself against these points of postponement I stop myself and breathe, realizing that within this I am not really finding any real solutions but I am only creating a point of friction and resistance within myself by laying a point of guilt over the points that require actually action.

I commit myself to stop the guilt experience within me and realize that what I am actually doing is creating a experience of irritation and anger towards my mistakes, and so not really acting on any real solutions.

I commit myself to then see and implement real solutions by utilizing my own ability to act and walk myself through the point of guilt and anger towards myself, facing the points and walking through the solutions as a walking myself through the things that I can do physically to deal with the points that I desire to just avoid.

When and as I see myself only judging my day from a point of being/making myself happy, I stop myself and breathe, and realize that this only a point of limitation within myself where I do not actually allow myself to walk through points that I would not normally support myself within and that would actually be a point of self support.

I commit myself to support me within the choices that I make in seeing past only what makes me happy and what makes me preoccupied within my mind and instead walk through the things that I would not normally find enjoyable.

I commit myself to form a new standard within myself about what is a successful day for me where I change the relationship from a point of limitation in only doing things that make me happy to things that are of self support within my process and within a point of supporting myself physically here within breathe and physical expression.

When and as I see myself only looking for the easiest possible route/choice, I stop myself and breathe and within this realize that this is causing me to miss out on sticking to a personal experience of myself as my actual true expression.

I commit myself to see, understand, and implement that the path that is not always enjoyable may be a path that may initially not be one that I would choose to walk when standing within a starting point of energy.

When and as I see myself subjecting to self abuse as/within my physical human body with things like smoking and skateboarding, I stop myself and breathe and within this realize that I am actually making these things harder to deal with since I a reenforcing my self definition within them.

So I commit myself to stop the physical abuse to myself and my body through the choices that I am using as a excuse not to walk myself through process with a point of integrity, and commit myself to realize that I need to stop the self definitions of certain things to change the things that I do from a point of dependence/definition to a actual life expression of myself.

I commit myself to walk myself through to a point of actual self expression by realizing what is really important within each day and consequentially each moment of breathe, showing myself within self honesty how I will navigate my mind to realize myself as my true potential here.

When and as I see myself fearing the idea that I might have to give up the things that I enjoy to walk my process, I stop myself and breathe, and realize that this is not a process of denial, and that what really matters is to become self honest about what my priorities should be within my day.

I commit myself to stop fearing losing out on the things that I enjoy doing, and instead form a self honest relationship with myself where I am able to fit in all of my commitments that I have made with myself and then allowing myself to really participate within the things I enjoy from a perspective of being free from guilt.

I commit myself to see that I am able to enjoy myself within the process of walking myself free from the mind and that taking the time now to walk myself out of the mind within a self honest stance of myself will actually allow me to participate in the things that I enjoy with a more expansive ability to create.

I commit myself to then realize that doing something as a point of generating a feeling or emotion is actually a limited version of doing that thing and really have a better understanding of myself within my ability to enjoy the things that I choose to participate within.

When and as I see myself not completely satisfied within this process that I have started I stop myself and breathe and remember what I am actually doing and why I started this process to begin with, which is a realization of the validity of equality and oneness.

I commit myself to realize the even though I have not fully stopped myself within the mind it does not mean that I cannot stand within a principle.

I commit myself to see how not being satisfied within this process would indicate that I am actually still looking for some reason to remain within the mind.

I commit myself to see how this manifest within my physical reality as the postponement of the commitments that I make with myself and instead place in all sorts of distractions and points of stimulation for myself to divert myself from what is really going on within me.

So I commit myself learn and implement the realization that satisfaction within myself will actually come from a point of walking within a principle of integrity where I am able to stand within equality and oneness with life in each moment, and that this will take time and effort.

I commit myself to stop the feeling of not being satisfied within this journey simply because it is not about stimulation of myself energetically, and within that realizing the illusion the energy actually presents.

When and as I see myself allowing these points of stimulation to interfere with he formation of supportive habits, like sleeping effectively, I stop and breathe, and from there work towards a solution where I remember within myself where I am and what I am really doing, asking myself if the things that I am doing are really going to support me within a point of working with what time is available to me each day.

I commit myself to see that no matter what comes up and how much I see myself being drawn to a point of stimulation to stop myself and apply common sense and see what will actually be the point of self support for me.

When and as I see myself not allowing myself to really get to know my own physical human body on the level of awareness of what is a adequate amount of time that I should be sleeping, I stop and breathe, and from there realize that this is a primary point of self respect that I should be able to work with in my self.

I commit myself to stop imposing my minds will on my body where I force myself to stay up late because I have given into experiences of generating energy, and within this trying to avoid a feeling of guilt within myself.

I commit myself to see that in that point, the imposition of my minds will on the physical to avoid guilt is not self expression, but rather a reaction.

I commit myself to stop imposing my physical body to endure the abuse that this imposition of my mind places on myself where it inhibits my ability to function effectively during my day.

I commit myself to see how a normal pattern of sleep will allow me to become much more effective within walking my process if I can work with all these points effectively and find the point of self directive ability within each moment in which I choose to stand as life or as ego.

I commit myself to realize that self trust is at the heart of all of this and that any time that I am not standing within self trust I will know it, and know the solution is always going to be self honesty about what it is that I am walking, or not walking.

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