271. Coming out of orbit. Sc.

When and as I see myself pointing Astronomy above the things that I realize are going to be the most helpful within my life in assisting me to become effective and stable, I stop myself and breathe, and put into practice the discretion to stand and place the points that I see will actually assist me in realizing my potential first.

I commit myself to stop placing points ahead of the points that I realize will really support me within my world.

I commit myself to use the discretion of what is most practical and useful to me in a placement of priority within my world and within that understand that the points that will be most useful will not always be the things that I WANT to do or spend my time on.

I commit myself to thus use the ability within myself to exercise discipline when I notice that I am just spinning my wheels in areas that will not actually assist me in stabilizing me here.

When and as I see myself using this interest in certain areas to generate a false sense of importance and relevance where I allow this importance to overshadow the common sense and realistic path within myself, I stop am breathe, bringing myself back down to earth and accept that certain areas are not going to really help me change my situation in any real way.

I commit myself to lay my desire to know about certain things aside and take up the point to walk a lifeline of realistic goals where this path leads me to walk through the points of disinterest and realize that this will ultimately allow me to place myself in a better position financially and allow me to formulate a new me that is able to make a tangible difference in this world.

I commit myself to move past the initial disinterest in the areas of finance and work with the capabilities that I see that I have where I utilize those abilities to the utmost of my potential for a the goal of equality and oneness within this world.

When and as I see myself being a subject to and a observer of myself within a feeling that is generated within certain areas, I stop myself and breathe and realize that this does not mean that I have to stop learning about points that I am interested in, but to form a understanding of where I am allowing and accepting myself to be only the observer of such knowledge and information where I am actually only in pursuit of some desire point within myself.

I commit myself to stop the addiction to the desires within me to know about how the universe functions and that this is really irrelevant at this stage, and that even within the current scientific understanding that the things that I am learning are not fully understood to any kind of accuracy or completeness.

I commit myself then to see how this pursuit of knowledge and information within this field are in fact generated within a as a point of desire for knowledge, information, and understanding, and within this stand as a point of lack of understanding of how I myself actually function and operate.

I commit myself to realize that this is really about placing my focus elsewhere, and not actually facing me as I have created and allowed myself to become a separate entity within this world where I only give something importance when I see that it interests me alone.

I commit myself then to stop designing myself around points of personality, where I place on category of study and pursuit as something that is good/fun, and another as tedious/bad, and instead realize and implement the knowing that get to a place of stability within myself I will eventually have to move past the resistance to look at myself and how I choose to conduct myself and my time here and actually walk a different path.

I commit myself to stop squandering my time and my capability to apply myself within the abilities and strengths that come to me naturally and instead use them for a purpose within my life that will lead me to the highest possible outcome for all life always.

I commit myself to realize that each choice is that which will lead me to this point or lead me to a point of falling and stagnation.

I commit myself then to continue taking this ego apart and working within the tools of self forgiveness and self correction so as to walk myself free from the mind and its trappings, and realizing that my time and opportunity is few and so I will need to exercise discipline within my life to see real change.

When and as I see myself using up my time within this point of interest rather then making it a point of pursuit within me I stop myself and breathe, and understand that I do not have to deny myself the interest in Astronomy and space related things but making it a priority in my life is not going to help me change.

I commit myself to recognize where I am allowing myself to use up the time that I have in pursuing Astronomy, when I really could be using my time for something more productive.

I commit myself to designate specific points and responsibilities of where I am going to apply me within my process, and within the things that I need to do to take myself out of the point of just survival and then allow myself the point of enjoyment within the interest that Astronomy provides.

I commit myself to see that currently how I use Astronomy is within a place and point of distraction of what is happening around me and within that not even actually fully giving the attention required within Astronomy to become effective within that, and therefore just wasting time.

I commit myself to stop wasting time and instead of using Astronomy as that excuse to waste time, actually give the attention that is required to it to really see the information effectively and see how if I am placing a specific time aside within my life for that interest I am able to enjoy it fully and actually pay attention rather then abuse it for a point of distraction from time for self investigation.

When and as I see myself looking at myself now within a position of guilt about what I have let myself become and within seeing the point of Astronomy as a point of ultimate failure within myself as the ultimate point of missing the ship as it were, where this represents all that I could have been, I stop myself and breathe, seeing that this is just not the time period in which many people are able to go into space, and that this just is not what I am here to do and what I CAN do.

When and as I see myself holding myself within a point of sadness about this apparent missed opportunity within myself I stop myself and breathe, and remember that I have plenty of opportunities that are available to me that will allow me to ensure that in future we can choose where to place our focus as a species and give the opportunity to those that are yet to come to actually hold the option to explore and investigate the universe.

I commit myself to stop realize that I need to stop placing all my dreams outside of myself and instead make them a tangible reality in which I work within and accept the opportunities that are available to me realistically.

I commit myself to stop getting down on myself about this point of not being able to go into space and to be a astronaut to the point where I look at any point of sci fi material or Astronomical material with a point of sadness that I will not be able to experience this now, and realize that if human beings in general will every be able to become space faring species as a common place normality, then we as individuals will have to work through all points of ego and self interest here, now.

I commit myself to stop using this sadness within myself about a apparent missed opportunity to fuel a desperation within myself to catch up within that field, and realize that this is only a reaction to a self definition of failure within myself in a point where it is just not really realistic to have been possible in the first place.

I commit myself to walk through this process to see that if I actually do care about this point of going to space then I should be able to put aside any point of self interest within myself and walk myself out of the mind to ensure that future generations will have that reality available to them, and realize that this is a realization that all those that will come after me are in fact me, and that I would be standing up within myself for the benefit of all as myself.

When and as I see myself holding myself withing a point of stagnation I stop myself and breathe and realize that within this point of constantly looking for something better outside of myself to focus on, I am actually only squandering the abilities that are available to me within myself.

I commit myself to stop looking for better experiences within point that are not realistic within my world, and instead focus on the things that I actually have control over within myself and realize that this is the real area that I can influence instead of looking for some experience out there in space as the ultimate point that would complete me.

I commit myself to stop the stagnation of my true capabilities and to instead use those capabilities to work through the points of separation within myself.

I commit myself to stop the stagnation of myself based on a feeling of resentment that this dream may not something that is realistic within my world and that I have to work on myself instead of getting what I want.

I commit myself to stop using this feeling as a excuse to not move myself because I still look at this as being unfair, instead of wanting to take personal responsibility, self honesty, and practice self movement.

When and as I see myself continuing to believe that I am able to make some significant change to the field of Astronomy I stop myself and breathe, and consider the complexity that others beings who are in the field have and the experience within that field and realize that within myself I am only coming from a place of mind, of projections, of ideas, and I really have not anything concrete to offer up within that group. And really all this is about is fame and recognition where I do not take value within myself first.

I commit myself to see that if I really capable of contributing something to that field of study that it would not come from a point placement of just desire this but a aware movement of myself through the steps in learning what is actually real, and what is just made up, which is actually a self movement.

So within this I commit myself to realize how the key to all change within myself is self movement and not the self definition in reaction to a desire for fame or praise from others and the world.

I commit myself to move myself for me, within the recognition that moving within the understanding of the principles that all are equal and one is imperative to the starting point of each moment that I move through.

When and as I see that I could be using my time within any given moment in a more effective, relevant, and meaningful manner I stop myself and breathe, and within this realize that what I a choosing to do is just delay the process here that will allow all to pursue the ultimate expression of themselves within a equal and one world.

And so I commit myself to realize the importance of walking as a real expression of myself where I see that I am really capable of and considering the impact that myself as a responsible being will be able to contribute to this world by giving up the desires and dreams of going to space as well as the feeling of needing to gain knowledge and information in that areas of study.

I commit myself to place Astronomy as nothing more then a hobby in which I can enjoy myself within in my free time if I so choose instead of making a self definition within myself in wanting/desiring to learn more about it, in a point of desperation.

When and as I see myself judging myself for where I am at within my life and gauging my success by things like money and fame, I stop myself and breathe and realize that those points are only relevant to the propagation and generation of those same points within my own mind, and that the real point of life here is how I am walking through within principles or without them.

I commit myself to let go of the idea of moving myself only from within a point of desiring fame and wealth.

I commit myself to see how those desires are only mind systems that compel me to dream about lavish lifestyles and judge myself from within where I am not, and hold me back from what I am able to really do within a layers of self judgments and anger towards my situation.

I commit myself to move past these mind and instead walk a life path that is within the principles of equality and oneness with life.

When and as I notice myself looking at other beings within a point of comparison with what they have and within that react in jealousy and self pity about what I do not have, I stop myself and breathe and see how this life is really what I make it and how I choose to conduct myself in each moment really is the key.

I commit myself to conduct me in such a way that fully understands that I am the one responsible for me and that i will ultimately make the choices that will allow me to stand or continue falling.

I commit myself to make the choice within my life that stand within the principles of equality and oneness, and remember that when I am faced within a comparison point towards others, in asking me if that is really something that I would like to experience within my world and within that how can I integrate myself PRACTICALLY instead of just reacting emotionally to this other being and what they have.

I commit myself to stop the jealously that I have towards Astronauts specifically because I have build up a idea within my mind about how cool it would be to go to space.

When and as I see myself fearing being seen within my world, I stop myself and breathe, and make a note to push myself to become more visible and that the jealously that I am experiencing towards other beings is really a point of not feeling totally satisfied within myself in where I stand and my inconsistency in and towards moving myself through my life within principle and self motivation.

I commit myself to stand up within myself as someone who can be seen and heard and push myself to overcome the hesitation within myself to remain the same within my own comforting bubble.

I commit myself to realize that when I look at people within jealousy it just means that I am not satisfied with myself and so within that I should be able to walk through the point of fear within myself that I will never reach what others have within my own world and instead just focus on what I can do in each moment to keep walking, and keep living within principles, breathing and remaining present.

270. Coming out of orbit.

Continuing with the last post I have been working with a point of how to prioritize and designate my time better, so as to become more effective within my ability to really live out my potential. Over the past couple days I have not succeeded. I spent quite a bit of my time learning about Astronomy. I like this idea of space. I am curious about how everything functions. I have a desire to go to space, and although I realize that this is fairly fruitless desire, and more about fun then anything else, it still exists, and is fuel for some kind of sadness. Perhaps its like one more point of “what I could have been” within me and I hold that against myself.

So the point within this blog is that things like studying astronomy is not something that I realize is going to really change my life in any significant way. I am able to become more effective and stabilize within my world if I focus mostly on the areas where I can actually show some change. I can work on myself rather then looking out there for this something better.

Astronomy is a cool area to learn about as a point of interest but it will not allow me to place myself within this world as any real point of influence. I will not be able to sufficiently move myself within that field in any sort of prevalence to support real world change.

So in this I see that this is a area that I should let go of to the point of not lending to much of my active time in pursuing. I should instead focus my time on grounding myself here on earth designating my time into areas where I see myself actually placing myself in a position to make my world stable first. It is undoubtedly apparent that this involves money. It involves standing where I am effective in money and time management to the point where I place myself in this world where I can actually have a voice. This does not mean I have to become immensely rich like I see other beings within society and remove the point of comparison to these beings, and instead bring back the focus once more to a placement of myself within facing the true potential of me and having courage to face the fear points that come up within those areas.

I know this will take time. I know that it will take patience with myself, but will also require me to stand in each moment and reevaluate what is really going to be the best for all as best for myself in each moment. I can see where I will have to step beyond my mind in those areas of fear and walk through them, creating a new me, a me that can handle the fear of standing up and being seen. This is the main point for me where I still fear being seen and heard, which is not acceptable.

So I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place importance on astronomy within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself this importance to overshadow my willingness to walk a realistic path within my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing this interest in Astronomy within myself to be driven and generated within a feeling.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to see my capability within that interest to absorb knowledge and information, and use that ability to confirm to myself that this is something that is worth pursuing when actually this is point of squandering my time and focus within a area of study that will ultimately not stabilize my life in any way.

I forgive myself for letting this become a point of priority rather then something that I can give attention to when I have free time, making this a point of interest rather then pursuit within my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold a feeling of guilt and shame about my vision of myself and my capability within Astronomy where I view this as a missed opportunity within my life and hold myself within that guilt for it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold myself within a point of sadness about this and thus move myself within a starting point of desperation, to learn as much and as fast as I can, to “catch up within that field”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use Astronomy as a point of distraction within myself to not apply me within the areas of my life where I actually see that I could be and am effective.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to chase the dream of going into space instead of realizing and coming to full acceptance of where the world currently stands within space exploration.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself the realization that if I REALLY do care about going into space that I should be able to place myself within this world as so as to make that opportunity a reality for other beings as myself in the future.

And so I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold myself stagnate because I consistently am looking for something better to pursue within my life instead of working with what is actually available to me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief within me that I can actually make some kind of significant change within this field, and in the grand scheme of things not accept the point that space exploration flight is not even a point of relevance to the human condition as it stands today.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to ground me, and realize that my time could be used in a much more relevant and meaningful manner which starts with learning the skills and dedication that it takes to stabilize myself within my own world first, in relation to life as equality and oneness, as well as to money which will allow me the ability to move myself and make influence a possibility within the starting point of myself in equality and oneness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I must become totally wealthy to have a voice within this world and not accepting that the main point to consider within this is HOW I conduct myself within my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself not see how this belief/desire to have tons of money is actually based within a comparison wit other being in this world and that I and actually just putting myself in a position of self-pity, where I view those with money with jealousy.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being seen within my life, and realizing that the jealousy that I hold towards people that are successful is really only highlights my own hesitation to stand up within myself and be counted one vote for equality. Be heard as one voice.

OK I will stop here for now and continue with the self corrective statements in the next post.

269. Interests vs Potential.

Last night I was doing some investigation into financial literacy. I was looking at banks, credit unions, (I did not realize even what a credit union was), online banks. I have recently been really attempting to figure out which path I should walk, and where I can be most effective within my life, what I would be satisfied with, and how I would best fit into bringing about a world that is best for all. I mean I can see that I have the potential for many things. I suppose the battle that I have in the past always fought with myself has to do with motivation and procrastination. I am getting much better with this, and while I am going to continue improving and refining myself in those areas now I can see that the biggest point that I am facing within this search is time. How to identify the points of priority and how to practically schedule myself.

I was looking at financial literacy courses last night on those free online courses, and invariably got pulled into the vast slew of resources, and class subjects. It was like “WOW, there is always so many interesting things that I could learn and pursue.” I was trying to figure out what would be useful to me, how could I benefit from physics knowledge? Chemistry? City water planning? So many things that would be potentially useful, but I mean really I noticed in the end that all of those are well just interesting things to learn. I realized that I don’t have the time to start more then one or two of these classes at a time as even though they only average from 2-6 hours a week that would really tighten up my schedule already. So I decided to go with one course that was more to do with getting my reality on track within my financial world, expand my financial literacy and one more of a exploratory course to see if I am actually interested in engineering. I also see it that is it will be necessary explore the aspect of public speaking at some point to face the fears that I see I have become programed as, and define myself by. I see that these points especially have much to do with expanding myself, facing myself within my fear of rejection and ability to work hard at things that I would not normally pursue. I see the points within my financial and public speaking areas as the most prominent in facing since they are the areas that I have the most friction towards, whereas engineering would be more about learning a new area of interest and working hard to apply myself in a new field.

So within all this I am going to have to really continue to become more effective and regimented with how I use my time. What I choose to do and when I do it. And to start realizing the actuality within my world about what is really relevant to my ability to experience myself effectively and what are only points of interest.

I will have to learn the skill of self management and learn to practice the self honesty and integrity that is required to make the most out of my time each day, stop wasting my time within areas that are of no practical use. I can see the potential for becoming overwhelmed and ultimately giving up but I must realize that the point here is really about finding my potential as a being here. Becoming effective within my life is not about denying the things that I enjoy, as I am frequently giving into as the prominent point of fear as why things in my life never get done, but to actually highlight my appreciation of those things by realizing myself within the things that I see will allow me to become a actual life force within the world, and will allow me to make bigger movements within my world and expand my influence, and ultimately design my life so I will have more time for things that I enjoy in the future, as well as create that reality for others.

The first step which I will cover over the next few days is what is it that I would actually be satisfied with in my life. Where would I be cool seeing myself, as it stands I have large dreams about money and within that I see that I have somewhat blocked myself from ever even starting to walk in any practical sense towards those dreams because they are so large. So firstly organizing my internal world, letting go of the dreams and instead working with what is realistic and available to me today.

So in the posts to follow I will start investigating the points that I see as real possibilities for me to walk, and why I still stunt myself from walking within them. As well as taking on those big dreams and figuring out what is the real reasons for holding value within those dreams.

Thanks for reading.

268. Letting others down easy. Part.3

When and as I see myself not realizing that the point to consider within my interactions with other beings is that I should be looking for self honest acceptance within myself, where I am totally satisfied with where I stand within myself according to principles.

I commit myself to trust myself in finding out where I actually stand and not fear making adjustments to myself when I can recognize that I am not in alignment of a self honest starting point within myself.

I commit myself to stop looking for acceptance outside of myself.

I commit myself to see how any time that I am looking for acceptance from others is a point of self dishonesty where I am not trusting and accepting me within myself.

I commit myself to thus work towards creating a stable me in all situation regardless if they include other beings or not.

I commit myself to realize that the primary foundation for self doubt begins within the acceptance and allowance of the mind within me still, where I am continuing to place value within thoughts feelings emotions.

When and as I see this experience of self doubt and non self acceptance start to interfere with and start to generate fear within how I am able to express myself about what I see to make sense, I stop myself and breathe, that I am really only placing a muzzle on myself.

I commit myself to see how the nonacceptance of me is actually a point of not fully integrating the REALIZATION of the principles of equality and oneness within myself, and that this is evident within the continued acceptance and allowance of the mind within me.

I commit myself to walk myself step by step through this process out of the mind so I am able to actually trust myself within all scenarios that I am in.

I commit myself to work within my process to break down the fear of voicing myself and trusting the points that I do see clearly to come through as a expression of myself.

When and as I see myself not taking the initiative to step beyond the fear of being judged and rejected by others I stop myself and breathe, and within this realize finally that beyond that fear is the freedom to make the choice that is best for all regardless what other beings think of me in that moment.

I commit myself to face myself and realize that if I do not there is no change within me, there is no opportunity for change since the opportunity is squandered within fear.

I commit myself to realize the this fear of being judged by others and thinking that I will offend someone or let them down within the point of voicing myself as I see and understand is really only happening within me, I am fearing those things and making that real within me.

I commit myself to see how in some cases there is the possibility for beings to react energetically to the things that I express, but to realize that this is part of the process of mankind and that I should not hold myself back when I see a opportunity to clearly state where and for what I stand.

I commit myself to see how sharing myself and the points that I have become clear within can be part of the process of all, where my small contribution can be a catalyst for change in others so I should not hold myself back within fear of judgments and ostracization when I realize that something within me can be stated clearly.

When and as I see myself noticing the point of not accepting me and silencing myself about my current position and understanding within the Desteni principles I stop myself and breathe, and see how this is actually a system of non self acceptance that has carried over from other areas of my life where I have not been accepting of me in those areas of my life in the past.

I commit myself to then stop in those moments and realize that I am only reliving the past patterns where I do not give myself the required trust to walk through my life with confidence, and realize that this is not actually who I am, but in reality it is a self accepted program based within fear of failure, and rejection.

I commit myself then to make a flag-point of the fear of rejection within me, and break it down by the application of the tools of self forgiveness and self corrective statements, and then go out and actually apply the changes that I have realize about myself within the writing.

I commit myself see that this is really nothing more then a irrational fear system within myself and that this is something that has been blown way out of proportion throughout my life where I am not actually having any sense of self importance to the person that it actually matters to, myself, and in this giving all the power of acceptance to the outside world which is not conducive to self progression, only self destruction.

When and as I see myself standing within a rut I stop myself and breathe, and make the connection that this is the cyclical nature of the mind where I the feelings generate the actions that perpetuate that system within myself.

I commit myself to put a stop to the feelings, emotions, thoughts that are the point of generating friction within me where I create the actions and inaction that hold me within the experiences of separation of myself as life and the mistrust of myself within self acceptance.

I commit myself instead to break the cycles of the mind where I do not accept myself to hold myself within a point of negative self view, and instead work with myself from a point of breathe as my stability and always come back to that point where I am breathing to find myself here.

I commit myself to work through the resistances within me in a practical way and see how this will require some planning and within that planning to make this a form self intimacy where I can look and self honestly find out what it is that I would like to do within my life, what are the things that I would aspire to achieve and first look at if they are realistic. Am I truly capable of such things? Or just in desire, and if so I commit myself to let go of those desire points and work within practically to get to a point of self sufficiency, and work out how I can be satisfied with my life at the same time as choosing paths that are best for all.

I commit myself to realize that best for all mean best for myself where I can subdue my self gratification to choose a path that will benefit all rather then only a myself and a few others.

When and as I see myself hold on to a belief that I MUST become super rich to be effective within my life and the world I stop myself and breathe, and realize that while money is the source of movement in this world presently, I do not have to define the success of myself as a being in and to money, as well as realizing the money will flow in whatever way that is relevant to the amount of input that I place on myself and within my process of creating myself as a effective being.

So I commit myself to see that creating myself effectively will always be the precursor to the responsible management of money within my life.

I commit myself to realize that the real change within my personal world has not to do with my financial situation, but my financial situation is but a reflection of myself within my personal world, and how I still relate and define myself within my own mind.

I commit myself to see that global change will have to come through the collaboration of responsible beings who are stable within themselves as self directive beings who understand the role and utilization of money effectively, and as such, I commit myself to walk towards that goal of stabilizing me, and my finances, not from a point of getting rich or getting what I desire, but to become a being that is satisfied within the way that I conduct and express myself.

So when and as I see myself forgetting where I am, and becoming bogged down with this point of obsession about my financial situation and how I will ever become rich, I stop myself and breathe and within this I realize that the focus should be on as point of walking my life process first and within that recognizing that in doing so I can learn the self trust and self honesty to really use my gift of life effectively, and there the money will come as a reflection of my self expression.

I commit myself to walk this process as a point of finding out who I am as the true potential of what I could be and not allow belief systems to control the point of where I stand within my life.

I commit myself to bring myself back and state to myself that I am here when faced with a situation where I see I am just standing as a product of my mind within beliefs.

I commit myself to stop giving power into the belief that I must get rich as fast as possible and such deny myself the pragmatic solutions that will form self trust and self motivation from the perspective of realigning myself back into equality and oneness with life first.

I commit myself first then to place the emphasis within my life/process on finding real answers and solutions to the points that I face and thus work within what can be measured as results here within the physical world and does not rely on projections of the mind for me to be stimulated within.

I commit myself to then utilize the principles of what is best for all as the guiding point for myself in my day to day living and stop the tendencies that I still hold to act within self interest.

When and as I see myself letting go of all others within life as being inconsequential with how I conduct myself, and do not accept the world, blaming it for my situation, I stop myself and breathe, realize that all I am doing is trying to cover up my own self transgression by projecting those things outward.

I commit myself to start taking on my own personal self responsibility for the things that I do, say, think and act, and so becoming trustworthy first to myself and then standing as a example that others may emulate if they see it as beneficial for all.

I commit myself to take action within my life and realize that word with no practical application are really on words with no substance and are in fact just lies told within myself and my mind. SO I commit myself to prove to myself that I am as good as my word.

267. Letting others down easy. Pt 2

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see how a low self worth is a cyclical condition where the feeling generates the action, or inaction more commonly within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not come up with a concrete plan within myself first, finding out what it is that I would really be satisfied with in my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself by something that another being has said and believe within myself that if I do not become rich that the world will not change.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the pressure of this belief within myself bog me down within a point of obsession where I face all sorts of internal friction within myself when in fact the only real point to consider is “Am I Here?”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing this belief to interfere with me actually forming trust within myself in finding real answers and solutions within my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be held up within my own belief structures and not consider the common sense points about what is the best area of application for me first, and work within that with self honesty, and directive ability.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to utilize the principle point of what is best for all in equality and oneness as the point of guidance from which I conduct myself within the practical living of the I am here statement.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to let go of all the rest where I do not accept the world and those living in it as it stands and within that place layers of judgment over-top of it/them and within that blind myself to my own behavior.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take personal responsibility when it comes down to this point where plain and simple the outcome of my life is equal to and one with the input of my actions or inaction.

And so I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to continue within the point of putting off taking action.

So when and as I see myself giving into experiences of fear within myself to do with uncertainty about others motives and level of understanding, I stop myself and breathe and within that realize that I am allowing this experience to exist by giving it focus within me, and making the realization that this fear is really a form of fear that is based from within points of uncertainty within myself.

I commit myself to see how this experience of fear exists in and towards others because I am not sure of my own standing/starting point.

I commit myself to see that this is generated within a comparison of myself vs these others beings where I am seeing within myself that I understand points within Desteni from within a intellectual level first and within that I become concerned of the direction and interactions that I have with other beings.

I thus commit myself to stop the point of comparison and give myself a reality check wherein I go back to basics within myself and living as a point of directing myself within the principles that I have learn within desteni, instead of only conceptualizing it within my mind.

When and as I see myself standing within a position of just wanting to be right and validated within myself instead of seeing what is best for all and how to approach a best for all solution within a situation, I stop myself and breathe, and within that see that I am just acting from a point of self interest and self perpetuation of not wanting to take any kind of action.

And so I commit myself stop taking the self righteous road and instead learn to see the best for all solution within any situation, where if I see something within a group that could benefit from a realization that I have made or that is in need of realignment, that I take that opportunity and work within that, instead of just wanting to run away with my ideas about what is right within my head.

I commit myself to work within the group where I can and thus find out if the view that I have is indeed accurate, or in itself needs realignment.

When and as I see myself in a position of fearing facing the uncertainties within myself I stop myself and breathe, remembering within myself that I am actually in a process of building self trust within myself and that this is something that I have never done before in self honesty, so it will take some time to gain a reliable footing within myself but the rewards for walking myself out of the mind are worth the point of facing the mind and giving up self interest.

And thus I commit myself to stop the fear of facing myself, my uncertainties and then walk myself step by step through this process, and realize that walking my process is the beginning of real change in this world where building that self trust allows me to take that self discipline and self action to all other areas of my life within who I interact within and what I choose to do.

I commit myself to become clear within myself first about what I see that I would be satisfied with doing within my life and what would be the most practical points for me to pursue.

When and as I see myself building up a experience of worrying about letting other beings down when voicing my concerns about a point or a issue I stop myself and breathe and realize that this is how things will take place within my process where I will have to become more comfortable and confident within speaking up for life, and that worrying about what others think about me or how they will react to hearing something outside of their beliefs will effect them is not always relevant, especially within groups that are geared towards changing the spectrum of economic or politics.

I commit myself to see the real point of voicing myself when I see the realization is best for all and stands within common sense.

I commit myself To realize that this is the fundamental point of focus within myself where I see needs the most attention where I am uncertain and not confident within voicing my current view.

I commit myself to voice myself when I can see clearly where I stand using the principles of equality and oneness as the guideline as my standing point.

When and as I see myself being influenced by and within what other beings are doing within their lives and I use this as a justification within myself to not stand up and talk action/voice myself from within where I stand, I stop myself and breathe, and remember that not taking action is how much of the points of separation in the world has been currently been placed and perpetuated.

So I commit myself to stop judging other beings for what I see as not being within the best interest of all, and realize that within those moments I actually have a opportunity to take a stand within myself and instead of judging others for their apparent separation to face my own fears of being judged and stand up and voice myself as I can see in those moments.

I commit myself trust within where I stand in my process, and trust that even if I a make mistakes within voicing myself the only actual real threat within this is personal self judgment where I start believing that I am not good enough, and that this is the real fear behind judgment from others, a fear within myself that somehow they are right.

I commit myself to see that I am more then just fear and reaction, and that having trust within myself is one of the most valuable gifts that I can give to myself.

I commit myself to work within myself to form self trust and find self honesty, and within this walk a path within my life to find out what I truly am capable of and what my full uninfluenced potential could be.

When and as I see myself allowing reactions from others to influence my ability to walk myself through process and place doubts within me, I stop myself and breathe, realign myself as the statement of “I am here”, and recognize the fear of acceptance from others is only taking place within me.

I commit myself to realize that I am the one that is actually directing me within my world and that not matter what anyone else thinks about me or says about me does not reflect the truth as I see within myself UNLESS I accept it to be so.

I commit myself to then realize that I can move myself past another beings judgments towards me, through the process of self realization as all as one as equal, by not participating in the mind and the addictive nature to blame others and point fingers at what they are actually doing or standing as when in reality I am only looking to cover up my own transgressions where I am not standing absolute.

OK I will finish up this post tomorrow as it time for bed.

266. Letting others down easy.

So I am facing a point where I find it hard to tell another being that I do not want to continue along a particular path.
This has been a recurrent theme within my life. This point has to do with walking a path that I do not necessarily see how inline this path is within the principles that I have started walking within the Desteni material.

I am facing a lot of friction within this and am very ambivalent on the subject since I have in the past had a strong propensity in not finishing what I have started.

In this point I notice within myself the desire to just have it go away, just ignore it and ignore those involved. Because I am unsure of where this is going or what it is they truly stand for.

Now the interesting point within this is it really only is highlighting my own indecision. It is really just showing how mixed up I am. I do not know where I am going with my life, I do not know what it is that I truly stand for yet. I can see common sense within the message of Desteni. I can hear what others within the group are saying, and see the space for me to take those principles in as my own… but have yet to do so in full. So what I do with other people is really just overlay that uncertainty on top of them. I am doing this with mostly everyone. Where I have nothing to say because I am not yet stable and committed within myself to stand behind the principles no matter what.

So yes the point here is to become clear and focused within myself about what I am doing, and not being afraid to stand up within that in ANY situation. I must become a being of integrity who knows what equality and oneness actually looks like practically. Right now, all I have is a green screen of guilt that backdrops all of my interactions with others. Where I feel like if I burst their bubble about what is real that I will not be liked or accepted by those people. Why do I care about that? Just because I do not accept me as the being I know that I am now. Just because in my mind I do not want to actually give up my procrastination of separation. That’s ridiculous. I should be able to stand, just breathe, and stand within understanding of where the world is at and instead of blaming worrying about where “they” are, find out where I really am.

Its difficult for me sometimes to see beyond these guilt tinted glasses, but that’s my choice of if I am going to wear them or not.

So,

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give into uncertainty about others based within a point of fear within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize how this fear is actually a fear of facing my own uncertainties within my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become clear within my about the most practical options for what I should be involved within my life, and within this constantly make decisions that are rooted within feelings rather then a clear understanding of common sense principles.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to always build a situation up and beyond what it is by worrying about letting other beings down, and what will happen when I let them down.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place the emphasis always on what others stand for and what their plans/values are rather then my own.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to find my own footing within my life where I actually can find out what my actual potential is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing others reactions to me walking to influence my walking and place doubt within myself about where I am going and if I will be accepted in where I am going.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that the point to focus on is self acceptance rather then being accepted by others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to disregard my own self acceptance to the point where I become afraid of actually voicing what I see, and why I see something to make sense or not.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not yet realize that I do not trust myself to voice myself yet is because within me I do not actually accept the principles as a actual self realization.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to walk myself out of the mind to a point of actually trusting myself to stand and voice myself in all situations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that this is why my life is so chaotic within my own mind because I am not yet taking the initiative to walk through the fear of being judged or rejected by others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not yet realize that this is really about a point of having low self worth where I have not in the past trusted myself enough to stand within a stable position, and this carried over into and as my starting point within the Desteni principles.

I will continue with this point in the next post.

265. Each moments potential.

So my internet was out for the past few days, and I have done some writing but not as much as I see that I could have.

I wrote some more about the point that I was working on before but I reach a point and really kind of “lost it”.

So here I am going to write about a point of blockages, I can see the potential within myself to form a trustworthy walking point. I see that point but keep running into this blockage where I just cannot quite get past sometimes.

I want to find out what this is all about, since I have done quite a bit of writing about this already, the point of just writing that is. I mean I am at a dead end on why I am still making it a point of forcing myself to do this rather then it be something that I enjoy.

I get bored I guess. I long for that distraction. When I know that I have time to work on my writing I will just always push it unto later. Turn on the game or something instead. I see that I have made a lot of progress so far, but in self honest examination of myself this is a real problem for me in the long term, I will not be able to be a effective force if I do not sort this out.

I do see that within a lot of what I am facing now it really stems from a negative self view, where I am constantly judging myself for my current failures, mistakes, and acts of separation. And from there I just punish myself internally, and call it even and move on but not really looking at why?? Why am I doing this to myself and to others? And in the question of asking why I can open it up and take a honest look at myself.

Slowing down and really focusing on what is really happening within this moment. I notice that a lot of the time I keep putting so much stuff above and beyond this moment when it come down to importance that I get sooooo messed up internally like this constant worrying aspect of myself, and within that I just keep looking at ways to escape from that worrying by adding something else to it, or distracting myself from it by forms of entertainment.

I have been having a lot of internal friction lately about what I see myself doing in terms of money/work/career, and I have had quite a few idea’s about this I wrote about it, but I have not wrote about it just for me. What would I be satisfied with? Where would I be satisfied within myself and what I can do? Where does my potential lie. I see that I have been carrying around this idea that potential is something that is akin to a dream, and my dream has morphed into this super rich mega human of some kind hahaha.

But dreams do not match reality, I see that I hold a desire to know all kinds of information, or rather I desire to hold that information now, like learning about chemistry fascinates me, but I just get bogged down with doing the actual work that is involved with actually making that a reality within my world.
Or for instance I got involved with a fledgling political party of which I was unfamiliar with the literature at the time, eager for change within the world I did not realize how much I would have to read, on a subject that I do have come to realize is not compatible with the principles presented within the desteni material.

So again it comes down to forming a routine that I can trust, something that I have committed to within myself to do every day, and within that making every day a step towards more awareness of myself. I have to stop placing myself in positions that are a reaching out grasping at something to give me self trust, when in actuality it is sometimes that I have to learn and walk within my own life first before I can start getting involved in earnest with other things. Not to say I have to wait within me to make moves and try new things or get involved but to recognize where I stand and for what I stand and make that the starting point of how I choose to move within my life instead of lusting after some dream of fame or riches in the name of equality, oneness, and freedom. To recognize what is the potential of myself in each moment rather then the potential of myself within a dream of who I desire to be within my mind. That is the difference that could use a investigation.

So I will stop there for tonight. I see what it is that I can be doing to work through these points and finally take a stand within myself. So I will push myself a little harder to see the edge of where my potential is at any given moment and strive for that. And remembering that the key to all of this is really within breathe. This moment in breathe is really the only thing that matters and is real, and from that breathe is my platform from which I then walk from.

Thanks.

264. Cute, sexy, beautiful, hot.

So here I want to open up on a point that generally effect me every day.

I definitely still have been defined within myself by a systematic structure of beauty. I realize that how I look at one being is not how I would look at the next. I place value within image still even though I would say that image does not matter. When it comes down to the point of attraction it does. It is interesting to note that within myself there are particular structures/conditions/images that make up the definition for these different words, (cute, sexy, beautiful, hot) and like in my mind they are not only about the outward appearance, and how it ties in within particular personalities that I see/interact with. But the part that is interesting is how I have made all this up within my mind. Like am I imagining it. Well on one level yes, I am imagining it, but on another level it comes back down to that awesome lovely social programming where I am bombarded by all this media and advertisements all over the place. I have heard the argument that instinctively we as males look/pick up on all sorts of unconscious cues when it comes to women, but that would just make me a product of instinct without actually taking accountability or directive ability within how I choose to view other beings. This point of social programming is in actually my acceptance and allowing of it, and not being self honest within how I walk with other beings within this world.

So back to how this plays itself out within my day to day living, when I go out into the world, on the bus, to the store, wherever, when I enter a new area I tend to notice the beings that I would consider attractive first. And something that I have been noticing lately is that I rarely if ever take notice of the other majority of beings within my radius of awareness. This is not cool and is something that I would like to sort out, and realize that this particular system is at the root of a lot of other points within me. Like how I interact with women, or how I treat a person based on first impressions for example.

So what would be the most prominent thing within this is how I give certain physical traits precedence over others, I have let it be known within me from a young age that there are certain parts of the female body are more private then others, when really its just all different bits of flesh one no more special then the next. But how it currently stands I see that I have a frighteningly precise measure of comparison between females bodies where I can look at two different girls in a moment and instantly within my mind find a “ranking” of how attractive they are based within my own personal taste and preference.

I notice that I have a definition/picture that is built into my mind consciousness system for all of the above words for girls, as well as other words, I could go into detail here but the main point of this post is about the system of classification itself.

So why do I do this? I mean all that I just wrote is pretty obvious. The action that is taken is almost like a compulsion. Where I have to like force myself to not just look around and seek out the beings that I classify in some way, for me to not just do this automatically.

I mean its not like it is a serious problem, like a obsession to the point where I cannot stop myself or look away, but I mean it comes up automatically when I am around/in groups of people (at the beach is a good example). I suppose it really just represents more energy within the mind where I am activating and charging those points within my mind, and as I can see from within the beach example, it is the generation of energy through a series of classification of female body parts where I have made specific parts some big thing within me so when I see them I react energetically. Pretty simple I suppose. I guess where it gets more complex is where I bring in my own self image and start to feel entitled to look at girls in that way, or that girls want me to look at them that way. I get a fair bit of attention, so I see that the roles can be reversed as well so I have subconsciously placed myself high on the rank of attractiveness towards females, I mean as a child I did not really look at these things like this but all these adults and peers as I grew kept telling me how “good looking” I am, so I suppose it stuck around in there in some respect, swelling my head, but at the same time I have never really been completely comfortable with having others look at me that way, it was and still is some amount of pressure, and I grew isolated within myself actually, nervous and self conscious about my image. So I can see how this applys to both sexes the point of classifying beings by the pictures they present rather then the realization that all life is equal and one.

So I supposed the first step within this would be to break down the idea within me that certain body parts are more noteworthy then others and within that realizing the point where I have created this classification/ranking system within me and finding out what specifically are the points in which I hold as criteria for the classification of women’s bodies. And men’s for that matter.

So I will pick this up again tomorrow with that point.

263. Taking directive ability and addressing the specifics.

So this is a post from over a couple days.

So within the theme of the post that I have been writing, something that I notice is how I have this tendency to look for the most profound points to write about. Within this it has lead me to end up taking on points that are part of much larger systems within me. And while I do see the support for myself within this, something that comes up is that I tend to loose focus and sight of the initial point. It becomes difficult for me to maintain my line of investigation within a point because often it ends up leading me into many other areas.

So here I would like to just write about and do self forgiveness on the point of slowing myself down and taking on the specific points once again within my day/life.

I notice that something that happens is that I within looking for a point that is bigger is I am going out to far ahead of where I currently stand. Like I am not actually standing within the words that I am writing in complete self application or even my ability to stand within those words at all. So it makes sense to slow myself down within my process and just focus on specific systems, words, and experiences that I have rather then looking for the deep roots of ideas that I have built up within my mind about things.

I notice that I should be able to walk through the specific moments that come up, pick one and work within it. Why do I not want to walk through the small stuff, the simple stuff first? I see that what I have been doing is that I want to make this process something more then what it is. I have become unconsciously impatient within myself, and in doing this I see that I am overstepping myself, its like I am see the points that I still struggle with and I am looking to solve those now. And example/analogy would be like trying to walk or run and telling myself in the mind that I can walk/run faster then this and force my legs to go faster, but the rest of me cannot keep up and I keep outrunning myself and falling. I have not placed the foundation/training in place to move faster. And I keep wondering why I keep falling within the basics.

Breathing is a perfect example of this, no matter how much writing I have done within/about these profound points within me I still am having a difficult time just remaining here within breathe. Even though I see that this is primary point within this process, I still get drawn off into all sorts of tangents within my mind. That point of stability has yet to be establish within me and this is the reason why I cannot seem to stay on track when it comes to everything else.

So a cool point of support that I learned about within my dip course would be that it does not matter what I am doing or what is going on within me that I can always just stop the mind at any time, take back my directive ability and remember that I AM HERE.

So within this I can see how even within this post there is a tendency for me to go off on some tangent making the specific point lose it focus and try to move to fast looking…searching for the reason within ideas, instead of walking out the solutions within self forgiveness.

SO here I will go into some self forgiveness on the point of not sticking with the specifics
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold a tendency/habit within myself by constantly looking for the most profound point to write about believing that this is the way that I will find clarity.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to overlook the specific points that come up within my day as the points that actually require my attention, despite how the look to be of smaller importance to me in the moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that within each moment the point of clarity must be present and that in the end the bigger points are actually a accumulation of all of the other points in what has created the more of me experience where I look to generate myself as something more then life through these larger systems within me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself then to overstep myself within my approach to my self forgiveness process in believing that the larger points and systems are actually more important to work through/on then the smaller ones, when in reality they are all simply points of separation within myself.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see and utilize the smaller points within myself as a point of working within what I am able to see clearly and work with effectively.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see how following the larger points often will not let me see the finer specifics and within this can become lost and frustrated within myself since I am not yet able to see clearly why I continue to fall.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and make my writing and what I take on bigger then where I currently stand.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing this to happen from within a self judgment of where I should be within my process in comparison with other beings.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to stand ahead of where I am because I do not like what I have accepted and allowed myself to be within the past and within this creating a experience of friction within me since I am not standing within acceptance of where I am now.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that when I stand ahead of myself I am not really even allowing myself to be here and one with the words that I am typing fully and within that basically am writing from a place of the mind first rather then awareness and realization through a process of walking each specific point as it comes.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to slow myself down to the point where I can see clearly how it is that I a experiencing myself within each moment of breathe.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself only to place the focus on the end point of not having systems anymore and thus make the topics of my application about the profound, when really what is something that I can work with is how I am creating and experiencing myself within each moment of separation and how I can take back those moments and build self trust through the application of the Desteni tools.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to walk through the points that come up at any given time and work with those points rather then working the other way around and trying to solve the effect points of how the world works current without even looking at how the cause of how I works specifically.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desiring myself to make this process something more then what it currently is within myself and continuously look for the biggest points to work with rather then finding the specific personal points that keep popping in the way of allowing my to remain stable here within breathe.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and run when I am yet unable to walk.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see how this is actually a clear indication of why I continue to fall on the basic foundational points of remaining present within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that my breathing is the perfect indication of where I am yet overstepping myself where I am making all sorts of statements and commitments that do not really reflect who I am within the moment in actuality of myself.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be OK with where I am within my process and in this place myself outside of where I am by projecting ideas and points that I believe to be more important then what I face within my personal world at the forefront of my attention.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see how this point is almost unconscious where I do not even notice how I take the focus from being about something that I am doing within myself to something that is extrapolated to the external world when I am not entirely clear within myself how I function completely.

I forgive myself within this for accepting and allowing myself to believe the since I have not taken care of all the personal points within my mind that I am not able to make observations about the world that I live within and how it functions with some degree of clarity, but it stands to reason that I should be able to keep the focus of my process on myself at this stage to make sure that what I am doing is clear from ego and self interested intentions.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel guilt for losing my focus within even a short post such as this.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that the main point within understanding where my process is real and where it is not real is within a point of self honesty where I am allowing myself to stand within trust of myself and who I am within each moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I must search out the answers to all of the problems that come up within myself and my life, instead of see this as point walk through the points that come up as they come up.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that sometimes I may not see the initial point of what I am facing, but realize that this is OK, and I should not judge myself within that and it is the walking of my process that is really the important point to become perfect about where I can trust myself to stick to the commitments that I make and the responsibilities that I have set for myself within my world.

Self corrective statements

When and as I see myself holding myself within a pattern/habit of things thinking/believing that the way to find clarity within my process is to look for the most profound points to write about, I stop myself and breathe, and realize that this is actually a point of not working within what is in front of me and accepting that the things that are happening to me and what I am reacting to are actually the points that require my attention.

I commit myself to work with the points that come up within me in a real time manner where I learn to address the points that are right here as the main points that will allow me to find clarity within my day to day living.

When and as I see myself placing these points that I view as being more profound as the primary point of value within my world, I stop myself and breathe, realizing that those points are actually a result of the accumulation of the smaller points within my life and are actually a result of not standing with stability within breathe in my life as a series of moments.

So thus I commit myself to realize that all points of separation are actually that, points of separation and they are ALL actually the same in terms of having to be dealt with.

I commit myself to realize that the smaller points are actually a point of common sense and self honesty to work with since they are points that I can have direct ability to work with and see that I have immediate ability to change.

I commit myself to work within the principle of breathe where I can actually test out my application in real time by see that if I am existent within a structure of thought/feeling/emotion then I am not clear within that moment and that something within that exact moment is requiring my attention and application of the tools of self forgiveness and self correction.

I commit myself to then to work within those points in real time where if I see myself going into a pattern of thoughts about a particular point, I use my ability to first stop and then apply self forgiveness for that point.

I commit myself to realize the effectiveness of actually walking my application for myself out loud, and seeing that this is really the point of self honesty where I able to be most effective for and within myself.

When and as I see myself desiring to take on large systems within me from the point of wanting to rush ahead and deconstruct those larger systems, I stop myself and breathe, and within this realize that within that point of wanting to take on whole systems at once it does not make sense, since this will take time and within the point of working within a particular aspect each day I will simply not have the time available AND see that by attempting to take on these larger points I always tend to miss out on the finer details of the systems and then in actually do not completely remove the system.

I commit myself to slow down the process of which I take on my mind to a point of being able to see and apply forgiveness clearly within each consecutive point.

I commit myself to slow myself down when looking for a point to write about and within that stop the jumping to the most profound experience that I can see, and instead just look for the things that make the most sense and relevance to me in what I see came up throughout my day.

I commit myself to realize that within the smaller specific points lies the potential to make actual profound realizations for myself and that the point of focus within this blog is not to downplay profound realizations but to actually stop the seeking out of the profound topics/systems/experiences/points as a requirement for me to write about, and remove the projection of that requirement throughout my process of writing.
When and as I am continuing to make this about the end point/goal of my process and allow that to influence my choice of what I look for within my application, I stop myself and breathe and instead learn to trust myself by walking with the desteni tools as a point of realization of how they are able to be utilize on a moment to moment basis.

I commit myself to apply the desteni tools of self forgiveness and self corrective application in and as any point of separation comes up as a realization that this is the were the actual ability for me to stand up within myself lies.

I commit myself to walk the points that I do not necessarily see as being profound in the realization that these points are actually the point of accumulation of which the larger systems are generated from and within that realize that becoming directive within each points is actually more effective, as well as time efficient then looking for always the larger and more prominent/profound points within my process.

I commit myself to become more efficient within my application so I am not constantly looking for the the points that will make me feel like I accomplished the most, and within this I commit myself to understand and implement that the point of deconstruction of my mind is really not so much about finding the large points but really about working with the points that are coming up with consistency.

I commit myself to understand that working with larger points is something that can always be done and that it is not like I should not work with large points entirely but what is relevant to my daily living and about a point of self honesty where I can clearly see the requirement for taking on larger points within myself.

I commit myself to work out where I actually stand within my process and work from there instead of looking for the large points and jumping ahead of myself.

So when and as I see myself not allowing myself to word with simplicity I stop myself and breathe and take myself back to a application of myself where I am looking at the things that are really relevant to how I live daily.

I commit myself to discern the things that matter within my process of application, and follow the principles of equality and oneness within those choices of where I apply myself, realizing that often the solutions lay simply within specific words and ideas that I carry around on a surface level.

I commit myself to realize that each word that I use may have a specific charge that I give it within myself and that this is a cool area to start deconstructing my mind attachments and judgments.

When and as I see myself attempting to make my writing more then what I current understand I stop myself and breathe and bring myself back to a point of awareness of myself here in the physical reality and realize that this is where I can be sure that I am being self honest within remaining clear.

I commit myself to recognize where I actually stand within my process and to stop making myself try and be something more then where I really am.

When and as I see myself walking outside of my current time line as a response to where I see other beings are within there processes, I stop myself and breathe, seeing how this is simply a point of competition that is still existent within myself where I am just reaction to another within comparison of where they are.

I commit myself to remove completely the point of comparison with others walking process and fully come to the understanding that this is my process to walk, and that finding my time line within my own application of the tools and principles is about SELF honesty.

When and as I see myself looking to stand ahead of where I current can see that I am, writing about the large profound points that I can see in the distance, I stop myself and breathe, and realize that what is happening is that I am reacting to a point of self judgment towards what I have accepted and allowed within my past.

I commit myself to let go of the guilt that I hold onto about myself from the past, and instead realize that what really matters within this process is how I conduct and apply myself here now within each consecutive moment.

And within that point I commit myself to see how looking to remedy that with jumping ahead and making my process about finding the most profound things to write about is really just a projection from a reaction to my past failures and mistakes.

I commit myself to realize that by jumping ahead within my process as a point of reaction I am not even allowing myself to be completely here within the words that I am writing and within that I lose out on a opportunity to actually be here within my words.

I commit myself to see how this actually becomes a point of just writing from the mind which really amounts to very little changes and real self realization.

I commit myself to then work with the specific points in which I can clearly see the points from a perspective of knowing where I stand in relation to that point.

I commit myself to then take on the point within a starting point of awareness of myself and where the separation actually lies within the point so I am not just looking to write from a point of sounding profound.

I commit myself to use common sense within the application of my writing so I can see that if I am not clear within the starting point of why, what I choose to take on in writing that I can stop and flag point that topic/system for another time and revisit it without thinking that I am giving up on the larger picture.

When and as I see myself looking to run within my process by looking for the largest points to work with rather then finding the specific points that come up within my day, I stop myself and breathe, and within that recognize that in slowing myself down I am able to lay down the foundation for me to move faster.

I commit myself to see how the foundation of my process lies within the consistency of my application and not the size of the systems that I a willing to take on.

I commit myself to see that regardless how much I would like to be free from my mind that I must recognize that this is a process and every process has steps and stages to it.

I commit myself to see how working with my specifics during my day I am able to form self trust and self respect because I am willing to walk through my day with consistency and learn the integrity that is needed to actually free myself from my mind.

I commit myself to see and realize that this is the main reason why I continue to have this experience of not being able to stand for very long within breathe because I have not committed to the point of really taking on my thoughts in the moment, and still giving value within them instead.

I commit myself to stop allowing my thoughts take hold as points of curiosity within them and from there just get pulled into the wake of my thoughts into a thought stream.

And thus I commit myself to stop giving value to my thoughts, realizing that this will not be easy since I have been addicted to the mind for so long, but if I am to free myself from my ego then it is necessary to stop giving into the mind.

When and as I see myself still not allowing myself to become comfortable within breathing and notice myself just letting my mind go off on all sorts of tangents instead I stop myself and breathe, realizing that this is the primary point within which I stand, understanding that breathe is my point of stability within a lifetime of mind energy.

I commit myself to just breathe whenever I notice myself going into mind movements, even when I am sooo tempted to just follow the stream of thoughts, I stop, and remember that within breathe I am here, I am clear.

I commit myself to understand that within breathe I am able to walk myself out of the mind in such a way that makes sense and that this is where I can be sure of myself when I am choosing what is relevant for me to focus on within my process.

I commit myself to realize that when I make decisions from within breathe there is a clear difference to the movement of myself than from when I move myself from a point of mind friction where typically there is all sorts of energetic experiences and thoughts that go along within the decision/movement.

I commit myself see how when I make decisions from the mind on what to focus on/write about within my process I usually overstep where I actually stand within my process.

I commit myself to stop making commitments and statements that do not reflect where I actually stand within yet and instead just focus on the things that I can see really need my attention and are relevant within my process today at this stage.

I commit myself to be OK within where I currently stand and see how this simple point of self acceptance is a vital part of learning to walk within self trust.

I commit myself to stop believing that the ideas I have about “out there” are really more important then the small specific things that are happening to me, and within this downplaying my very beingness and making myself inferior to the points that happen “out there”.

So I commit myself to walk with myself so I do not anymore place my journey back to life in a inferior placement of the journey of earth and creation and instead understand that my journey is that journey in action.

When and as I see myself shifting the focus from my internal self and extrapolating it to the external world, I stop myself and breathe, realizing that I have not been directing myself within awareness of myself and bring myself back to alignment with breathe making sure I am clear before proceeding.

I commit myself to realize and keep myself awareness on on my breathe and realize that I have always tricked myself within the points with subtlety, where I do not even notice when I go of the rails at times.

I commit myself to bring myself back to breathe whenever I find myself of track.

I commit myself to realize that the point within this process is not to deny or control what to write about and that making observations about the world that I/we live in is cool when approached with clarity, but also to understand that within my personal process I should be mostly keeping the points in relation to what I am experiencing within me at this early stage.

And thus I commit myself to continuously keep bringing myself back here where I can stand within breathe and learn to trust that breathe as the life giving force within me and stop the idea that the mind is that force.

When and as I see myself continuing to lose focus and I go into a point of guilt about it, I stop myself and breathe and within that fully understand that this is how it is going to be until I actually stand up within me and walk through everything so, within that realization I commit myself to stop feeling the point of guilt as a way to just slow myself down and place a wall in front of myself.

I commit myself to just walk through the points as I see them as they come up and forget about trying to solve all the mysteries of my life all the time, and realize that that is a crazy and impossible task that I set for myself in which I will always end up falling and failing and cycling around within a guilt point.

So thus I commit myself to the small points even though I do not in my mind want to see the importance of them or take them seriously, and realize that walking in stability and clarity is the key to this process.

I commit myself to see the difference between what is real and what is mind is always within a point of self honesty where I am walking within principle within myself, just breathe within the moment, trusting myself and knowing where I am within each breathe.

And so I commit myself to just be fine with the speed and pace of the realizations that come through and while pushing through the resistances within applying myself within process to always realize that any realization will come up naturally and anything that I force is actually only a mind projection of the what I believe/want the truth to be within my mind.

I commit myself to this process of mind deconstruction and trust myself in walking it for me, realizing that within the specific points that relate to myself within my process and taking directive ability within that I am the one who begins to stand and walk myself back from being a slave to my mind to a actual real being who takes value in life as equal and one with myself.

262. The small things. Sf+Sc.

SO, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up the real directive ability that I have within myself to the habits and distractions that I choose to place in and as the central focus of my day and the way that I experience myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to chase energetic experience within the the simple points of maintaining my living space.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use those simple points as well as other points of distraction like watching TV, playing games, and watching documentaries to be at the forefront of what I choose to do first within my daily life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing those points to be of greater interest to me, rather than walking through the commitments that I have made with myself in walking process.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the struggle that I create within my day by placing the things that can wait or postponed with no ill effect on my ability to walk process in/as a greater value to me because the are about stimulating me energetically. SO, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up the real directive ability that I have within myself to the habits and distractions that I choose to place in and as the central focus of my day and the way that I experience myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to chase energetic experience within the the simple points of maintaining my living space.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use those simple points as well as other points of distraction like watching TV, playing games, and watching documentaries to be at the forefront of what I choose to do first within my daily life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing those points to be of greater interest to me, rather than walking through the commitments that I have made with myself in walking process.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the struggle that I create within my day by placing the things that can wait or postponed with no ill effect on my ability to walk process in/as a greater value to me because the are about stimulating me energetically.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to still give into the experience of getting energetic experiences within the mind, and making that the most important thing to do first.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be aware of what I am doing and within this do not investigate how I am able to become more effective with my time and with my choices in what I do each day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to postpone the things that are required for me to do and thus create a experience of always being behind and never being satisfied.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to never see the point where I am covering up my ability to become more effective since I am judging and taking value within my experience of me based on the energetic feelings that I gain from something.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the guilt that I experience within myself when I do not follow through with my commitments to be the factor for which I do not actually choose to address the point of really walking with integrity throughout my day.

And within that I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to only based my days on the set of conditions within a point of feeling happy or not bored.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to miss out on the ability for me to be the most effective being that I possible can be because I have been choosing to continue looking for the easiest possible way to make it through the day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that within this point that I am actually making things harder for myself by abusing my body with less sleep and subjecting it to things like smoking.

Within these points I forgive myself for not allowing and accepting my process to be about walking this as a point of self honesty where I actually am standing as a real expression of who I am, what my potential is that I can see within myself to be possible and how I would get there.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give into the fear that I will have to deny myself the things that I enjoy to walk this process, where it really only comes down to a point of self honesty where I can actually look at myself in the mirror and
say “yes, you accomplished all you set out to do today.”

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to be completely satisfied with the process that I have started to the point where I will continue to seek out things on top of and beside my process that are more important for me to be doing or pursuing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my habitual patterns to interfere with my ability to form a supportive sleeping routine.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to downplay the importance of sleep and believing that I can function the same on 4 hours as I can on 6 or 8, and in fact have not ever really figured out what is a proper amount of sleep that I would need personally.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing this point to become a point of self abuse within my life where I am not allowing myself to form effective behavior by denying myself adequate time for my physical body to rest.

When and as I see myself giving up my directive ability to habits and distractions, and placing these as the most important point within my day, I stop myself and breathe, realizing that in doing so I am in fact creating this experience of giving those habits and distractions the central focus of my world.

I commit myself to stop taking up the belief that my habits have more power over me then I have within my ability to direct me.

I commit myself to realize that being here, standing clear within myself is really the only true point, and if I am having all sorts of experiences within my day about what I should or should not be doing then I realize that this is occurring within the mind.

I commit myself to realize that the point of walking myself through process is really about forming a point of self trust.

When and as I see myself chasing after energetic experiences within my daily responsibilities by postponing my commitments to walk process by placing my daily living duties as a form of escape from walking process of writing.

I commit myself to form self trust within my process by coming to a common sense understanding of what is actually the priorities within the tasks that I choose to do.

I commit myself to see how placing my daily tasks of maintaining my living as a excuse to not walk my process within writing, and within this understand that I need to make time for both aspects of my life where I do not neglect any points of my existence.

I commit myself to see that placing one point above and before another is a point of self denial within how I choose to spend my time and that within that lies a point of self abuse.

I commit myself then to work on both aspects of my living and my process with common sense where I allow myself the time to walk through both points with equal importance and stop using basic daily tasks as the reason why I do not have time for process.

I commit myself to realize that things like watching TV, playing games, watching documentaries are actually things that I can utilize to supplement my life and that placing them first within my life will invariably cause me to neglect myself within walking process.

I commit myself to realize that I place these things as a greater interest to me because I do not actually have to actually face myself directly and I can push back my process of self realization.

When and as I see myself struggling with these points where I look over the fact that many of the things that I am choosing to do actually are not required to be done first and foremost and that within a point of self honesty they are in fact not required to be done when I think that they need to be done and will actually have no ill effects on my experiences of myself in each moment.

And so I commit myself to become self honest about what is really important to be done where I realize what will actually interfere with my ability to walk with myself through process.

I commit myself then to realize what the things that are placed as the priority within my daily living that are only for creating a energetic experience within myself.

I commit myself then to come with a concrete understanding of what will actually support me in being here physically, and support me as my physical human body.

When and as I see myself living within a state of unawareness of what my actual priorities are and could be within a supportive platform of behavior I stop myself and breathe, and within that moment reassess what is really going to be the most effective choice for me to take within that moment.

I commit myself to practice self awareness of what will actually lead me to a decision that is best for myself in the realization of what will lead me to a situation where I will be most effective in creating myself as a example of what is best for all.

I commit myself to realize that the decisions that I come to should be based within a understanding of the things that are required for me to support myself and my partnership physically first.

When and as I see the decisions that I make to be things that are not required at that moment and within that create a experience within myself of always falling behind, I stop myself and breathe, and within that realize that that experience is actually happening within my mind only and from there influencing me energetically to try and make up for the energetic feelings of being behind by creating a more for me experience of positivity to compensate.

I commit myself to realize that this only leads to more procrastination and postponement of the things that I really would need to do to become self supportive.

I commit myself to see how this scenario actually constantly leads me in circles/cycles of which there is no end until I choose to break those circles/cycles and walk a path where I choose to act with integrity of the things that I realize are going to be actually supportive for me.

When and as I see myself only judging my view of myself, and taking value within myself by the energetic experiences that I have, I stop myself and breathe, and understand that this is actually not real as it is only showing me who I am within a starting point of energy and is not actually a point of physically walking myself within self trust and integrity.

When and as I see this to become a point of guilt within myself where I start to judge myself against these points of postponement I stop myself and breathe, realizing that within this I am not really finding any real solutions but I am only creating a point of friction and resistance within myself by laying a point of guilt over the points that require actually action.

I commit myself to stop the guilt experience within me and realize that what I am actually doing is creating a experience of irritation and anger towards my mistakes, and so not really acting on any real solutions.

I commit myself to then see and implement real solutions by utilizing my own ability to act and walk myself through the point of guilt and anger towards myself, facing the points and walking through the solutions as a walking myself through the things that I can do physically to deal with the points that I desire to just avoid.

When and as I see myself only judging my day from a point of being/making myself happy, I stop myself and breathe, and realize that this only a point of limitation within myself where I do not actually allow myself to walk through points that I would not normally support myself within and that would actually be a point of self support.

I commit myself to support me within the choices that I make in seeing past only what makes me happy and what makes me preoccupied within my mind and instead walk through the things that I would not normally find enjoyable.

I commit myself to form a new standard within myself about what is a successful day for me where I change the relationship from a point of limitation in only doing things that make me happy to things that are of self support within my process and within a point of supporting myself physically here within breathe and physical expression.

When and as I see myself only looking for the easiest possible route/choice, I stop myself and breathe and within this realize that this is causing me to miss out on sticking to a personal experience of myself as my actual true expression.

I commit myself to see, understand, and implement that the path that is not always enjoyable may be a path that may initially not be one that I would choose to walk when standing within a starting point of energy.

When and as I see myself subjecting to self abuse as/within my physical human body with things like smoking and skateboarding, I stop myself and breathe and within this realize that I am actually making these things harder to deal with since I a reenforcing my self definition within them.

So I commit myself to stop the physical abuse to myself and my body through the choices that I am using as a excuse not to walk myself through process with a point of integrity, and commit myself to realize that I need to stop the self definitions of certain things to change the things that I do from a point of dependence/definition to a actual life expression of myself.

I commit myself to walk myself through to a point of actual self expression by realizing what is really important within each day and consequentially each moment of breathe, showing myself within self honesty how I will navigate my mind to realize myself as my true potential here.

When and as I see myself fearing the idea that I might have to give up the things that I enjoy to walk my process, I stop myself and breathe, and realize that this is not a process of denial, and that what really matters is to become self honest about what my priorities should be within my day.

I commit myself to stop fearing losing out on the things that I enjoy doing, and instead form a self honest relationship with myself where I am able to fit in all of my commitments that I have made with myself and then allowing myself to really participate within the things I enjoy from a perspective of being free from guilt.

I commit myself to see that I am able to enjoy myself within the process of walking myself free from the mind and that taking the time now to walk myself out of the mind within a self honest stance of myself will actually allow me to participate in the things that I enjoy with a more expansive ability to create.

I commit myself to then realize that doing something as a point of generating a feeling or emotion is actually a limited version of doing that thing and really have a better understanding of myself within my ability to enjoy the things that I choose to participate within.

When and as I see myself not completely satisfied within this process that I have started I stop myself and breathe and remember what I am actually doing and why I started this process to begin with, which is a realization of the validity of equality and oneness.

I commit myself to realize the even though I have not fully stopped myself within the mind it does not mean that I cannot stand within a principle.

I commit myself to see how not being satisfied within this process would indicate that I am actually still looking for some reason to remain within the mind.

I commit myself to see how this manifest within my physical reality as the postponement of the commitments that I make with myself and instead place in all sorts of distractions and points of stimulation for myself to divert myself from what is really going on within me.

So I commit myself learn and implement the realization that satisfaction within myself will actually come from a point of walking within a principle of integrity where I am able to stand within equality and oneness with life in each moment, and that this will take time and effort.

I commit myself to stop the feeling of not being satisfied within this journey simply because it is not about stimulation of myself energetically, and within that realizing the illusion the energy actually presents.

When and as I see myself allowing these points of stimulation to interfere with he formation of supportive habits, like sleeping effectively, I stop and breathe, and from there work towards a solution where I remember within myself where I am and what I am really doing, asking myself if the things that I am doing are really going to support me within a point of working with what time is available to me each day.

I commit myself to see that no matter what comes up and how much I see myself being drawn to a point of stimulation to stop myself and apply common sense and see what will actually be the point of self support for me.

When and as I see myself not allowing myself to really get to know my own physical human body on the level of awareness of what is a adequate amount of time that I should be sleeping, I stop and breathe, and from there realize that this is a primary point of self respect that I should be able to work with in my self.

I commit myself to stop imposing my minds will on my body where I force myself to stay up late because I have given into experiences of generating energy, and within this trying to avoid a feeling of guilt within myself.

I commit myself to see that in that point, the imposition of my minds will on the physical to avoid guilt is not self expression, but rather a reaction.

I commit myself to stop imposing my physical body to endure the abuse that this imposition of my mind places on myself where it inhibits my ability to function effectively during my day.

I commit myself to see how a normal pattern of sleep will allow me to become much more effective within walking my process if I can work with all these points effectively and find the point of self directive ability within each moment in which I choose to stand as life or as ego.

I commit myself to realize that self trust is at the heart of all of this and that any time that I am not standing within self trust I will know it, and know the solution is always going to be self honesty about what it is that I am walking, or not walking.